5 Ways to Nail Your Best Man or Maid of Honor Speech

San Diego Wedding Photographer

5 Ways to Nail Your Best Man or Maid of Honor Speech


Don’t be the person who is stumbling through their notes or phone looking for what you’re going to say. Practice, practice, practice. My husband was recently the best man at his brother’s wedding and spent the week leading up to the wedding practicing his speech ad nauseam. He asked for opinions and practiced speaking with confidence--and he nailed it! Trust me when I say these speeches are best delivered when they are well developed, not just off the cuff, so prepare what you want to say. Here are three tips to start the creative juices flowing:

    1. Think about your relationship with the bride and groom. Is it fun? Do you have long soul chats, do you love to do nothing with each other, or are you always going on trips? Reflect on what makes your relationship with them special.

    2. Think about what makes them a special person and what qualities they have that already make them a good friend and will definitely translate into great spouse.

    3. Think about why you choose to have them in your life.


This is the time to use your personality. Don’t sit down and Google best man jokes, because chances are people have heard them before. Be confident and funny if you’re that kind of person. Tap into your sweet and emotional feelings if that is more you. Don’t try too hard to please the crowd and be someone you aren’t. Speak to the bride and groom from the heart and be genuine, because these words are for them. However, with that being said, remember that you are in a room full of people that you may not know very well, so be a little guarded with what you share, and keep anecdotes short to respect others time. The guests don’t need to know your entire chronological timeline with bride/groom.


Don’t mention exes or the groom’s “wild past” (actual words I have heard before in a speech!!). This kind of goes hand in hand with #2, but it is almost never okay to share about past relationships and wilding’s of the bride/groom UNLESS it somehow directly led to their now-spouse. The MOB (mother-of-bride), doesn’t need to hear on her son’s big day about his one night stands and blacked-out nights. This could seriously embarrass parents on both sides. If the urge to share is too strong, I suggest using the time that you are getting ready with bride/groom to reminisce about how far they have come, not later..into the microphone..with 100 or so people awkwardly staring up at you. There can always be exceptions of course, such as a first crush or a kindergarten first kiss, etc. But just use your common sense and best judgement, and fall back on, “If I wouldn’t want this shared at my wedding, then I shouldn’t share it here.”


Have your speech be about both the bride & the groom, not just one or the other. It’s not about you and your relationship with them, everyone is here to celebrate the newly betrothed. If you aren’t close with the bride, but you’re the best man, address the bride by sharing with her how you think her groom will be an amazing husband and why. I would say the same thing if it was a bridesmaid addressing an unfamiliar groom, take this time to share how the bride spoke about them when they were dating, or how she has changed (positively) since the beginning of their relationship. The point is to not exclude either the bride or groom, speak to them both, encourage them on their new journey, and reinforce the fact that you will be standing beside them in their life, just as they chose you to do so for this day.


2-3 minutes maximum. No one likes a long-winded speech, and let’s be honest, at this point everyone is hungry! Keep it short, sweet, and heartfelt. The sooner that you say this speech, the faster you can dance it out with your best friends!


San Diego Wedding Photographer